Stroke of Luck?

I’m not sure if I should go buy a lotto ticket right now or just wait for the inevitable shit storm that is obviously brewing, since it seems that I will not be getting arrested today afterall. I’m kinda liking the fact that I don’t have a record!

Here’s what happened…

A few weeks ago, I got the survey in the mail for Jury Duty. I have had to do this once already and it didn’t work out so well for me. Anyway, I fill it out, send it back, then end up with the summons in the mailbox, shortly there after. GREAT! Not looking forward to this at all, but I put the summons aside where I will find it and mark my mental calendar.

That’s where things go bad! It seems that my 9 yr old has a better mental calendar than I do. This month has flown by so fast, I really haven’t paid attention to actual dates. Malerie, on the other hand, knows the dates for everything! (hopefully she retains this affinity for remembering dates as she gets older..that will be helpful in History and English classes. God knows she can’t remember anything I ask her to do for me!)

So, when was Alissa supposed to report for Jury Duty? According to the summons, 8 am on Monday, July 23! Yeah, that would be today! Mal rolls out of bed and the third thing she tells me is,  “You have Jury Duty today, mom. What time are you supposed to be there?” Me (after a colorful string of cuss words, that I try really hard not to use in front of my children, as I’m flying off of the kitchen chair to find the evil summons) “8 am”. Madelynn (11) “Umm..don’t you get arrested if you don’t show up?” (Shut up, Madelynn, shut up! Your knowledge of this part is not helping my nerves any!)

Me -doing a lot of “shhoosh-ing” and fast dialing, meanwhile trying to assure myself and my kids that I’m not going to the pokey today..finally gets ahold of the lady at the Jury Commission. I explain to the woman, who definitely did not sound thrilled or impressed that I, an adult, just confessed to not knowing what date it was, that I was supposed to be there and honestly forgot. She asks for my ID #..I read it off.. and her tone changes to one of pleasure when she informs me that I was one of the Jurors that didn’t have to report today. I continue to thank her as she begins to laugh..yep, this woman is laughing at me and thinking I am, quite possibly, one of the biggest mental midgets in Winnebago County!

See, if I would have remembered this was going down today, I would have known I didn’t have anything to worry about, because I would have been informed last night when I was supposed to have called the phone number!

So, now I’m wondering if I should play up my luck – since, normally I don’t have any, or lock everyone in the house and not answer the phone or doors, because something is bound to make my day turn to crap!

Oh, wait…kids just walked in and ones crying already! Here we go!

Sorry for errors…this ones posted from my handheld lifeline a.k.a. my phone!

Hey You…

Yeah, you! You kind, gracious folks that are following me! Can you do me a favor, please? There are a lot of e-mail addresses I don’t recognize, and that is fine, I don’t care if you would like to remain nameless to me! Oooh, and other boggers, that are far cooler than I will ever be! I am just more than ecstatic that I have followers…What I would love to know is, and this WILL help me in more ways than you could ever understand, what drew you to my blog? Why are you following me? What would you like to see in here? It isn’t much yet, but I’m working on it..getting the feel for it..letting people in. It will probably be much easier when the little ladies go back to school and I can spend more time on it. If you guys could comment and let me know, I will be forever grateful! Seriously, there could be cookies or something involved for some of you! *If all else fails, bribe ’em with sweets!*



Umm..NOT helping much? Lack of participation has me wanting to throw a temper tantrum! This could be disturbing on many levels, for those who have to witness it! I will sit quietly a little longer..but, it only gives me time to stew! (evil laughing is never good)

I Do Not Regret To Inform You…

I do not regret to inform you that the final decision was made last Friday, before our trip, that Mr. Weenie had to go. I know, I know, I have already heard the groans about Facebook and Twitter updates regarding the dog, but it was way. past. time. I’m sorry if you don’t find me interesting enough to keep as a friend due to the fact that there will be no more #NotoriousMrWeenieStrikesAgain posts! lol..I will try to find something equally as amusing! The girls were upset at first, but I think they have realized that life has been a hell of a lot easier this past week. The girls both caught some flack from friends because “he was just a puppy”, “he didn’t know better”, “give him more time”, blah, blah, blah. Well, I’m sorry, they don’t understand the fact that inbred imbecile cost us a shit ton of money!

I am excited to know that I can now open the door for company without wondering where he is and if he is going to get out and run the neighborhood like a raped ape. I can replace the mini blinds on the windows that he chewed through because we were not courteous enough to open them before we left so he could see out. I don’t have to worry about putting the garbage up, pushing chairs in, or forgetting to our shoes on the porch so that he can’t eat them. FUN FACT: Last summer alone, that moron ate at least 10 pair of flip-flops…and when I say he ate them, that means that he decimated them into tiny little bits then proceeded to struggle to poop colorful logs on the front lawn. I know, it all could have been avoided if we would have remembered they were out, but flip flops were the last thing on my mind as I was cleaning up his other messes!

The final straw was the Saturday before, I forgot to put the garbage up before I left for my daughters softball game. I had a ton of things on my mind and just plain forgot. Silly me, right? Well, I had thrown away a chicken carcass after making chicken salad (kick ass by the way!), he tipped the garbage over and ATE IT ALL! The bones and everything. I swear he has 9 lives because that wasn’t the first time he had done it and aren’t dogs supposed to choke on chicken bones? I was not informed of this go round with the garbage until the next day, since the hubby and kids came home before I did and picked up what mess was left. I did ask what died on the kitchen floor since there was a large spot that no one cleaned up, but I didn’t get an answer on that one. Nope, I got to find out the hard way when the dog had the raging runs and was throwing up the next day! Fun Fun! Just how anyone wants to spend their up dog puddles! Anyway, we had finally just had enough of his constant messes. Our kids were never into as many things as he was when they were little! BUT, on a bright note for those who may be concerned about his well-being, we believe he has already been adopted and hopefully he is with a family with a fence! Bright note for me? I haven’t had to clean up a pile of dog crap off the living room floor in a little over a week!

Back To Reality & Stuff…

Back from vacation! Yea! I’m sure I will be posting about our adventures soon, as I have had a few requests to hear about the shenanigans that took place. Most people aren’t overly excited to be home from vacation, but we all know that I am not most people! I was out of my element for a little too long. The only part about coming home that I absolutely hate is the excess laundry! Holy shit, you would have thought we were gone for a damn month with everything that flooded the laundry room floor, not to mention the sheets and towels that I had to get done to do back to the in-laws, right away! BUT, I am happy to say that we got to our house around 4-ish yesterday afternoon and I am on the last load…that is progress! AND, I didn’t have a whole lot of time to write, but I got a lot of inspiration!

So, since I decided to jump on the actual computer and check out a few things, I thought that I would try to re-vamp my space a bit. I guess, like this whole blog thing, it’s a trial and error. OOOHHHH… and having said “trial and error” I cannot figure out how to get certain tabs at the top of my page. I would like an “About” one so that I can reiterate a few things. One being this is MY blog! If there are errors, I don’t really care! I don’t follow rules! Once I figure out what the hell it is that I am doing it might be a little better!

Anyone who is following me is more than welcome to e-mail me suggestions. I have seriously thought about checking into seeing of there is a book “Blogging For Dummies”, just to help me out! I appreciate help and I like to chat, so more power to ya!

Busy, busy..

It’s been a little bit, so I just wanted to drop in here and let y’all know I’m still alive! Slightly crispy, tired, but kickin! We had a good 4th. As always, we go to my parents house before the parade starts and the bloody marys are a flowin! The parade route is a block down from their house, so we can just walk without having to search for a place to park. We usually do a cook there, too, after we hang around most of the day and ingest a beer or two, too many! This year we came home, cooked out with our great friends, and just kinda relaxed in the air as much as possible, since we have seemed to have landed ourselves in the middle of hell, weather wise! It has been 70+ years since we have seen heat and heat indices like this. It’s not cool! (literally)

This week has just been non stop with us buying a car, the holiday, and getting ready for our family vacation. Luckily, the weather shows it is going to be in the 80’s during the day and lows in the 60’s at night, where we are going. This is my favorite part…sleeping with a fan in the window on cool night in the north woods! Of course, I love being eaten alive by horse flies at the lake and sand everywhere, too…I mean, what parent doesn’t?! Anyway, I can’t wait to go, relax, have coffee on the deck, read, write, and spend time with family and great friends!

Here’s hoping we don’t see any bears this time! ; )

Have a great weekend!

Sorry for errors…this ones posted from my handheld lifeline a.k.a. my phone!